We at the Widower's Toolbox would like to extend our sympathies
to you if you are visiting this site as the result of the loss of a loved one. Please know that you are not alone
and that others have traveled a similar path as your own. Please take a moment and peruse this website as a good place
to start to begin to repair your life from loss. Read below to learn more about the book that started it all...
The Widower's Toolbox:
Repairing Your Life After Losing Your
by Gerald J. Schaefer with Tom Bekkers, MSW, ACSW
The grieving process following the loss of one’s spouse is arguably the most personalized and difficult experience one
may ever face. While the grieving process is individualized regardless of gender, there are distinct differences
in the manner in which males and females grieve. There is no right way to grieve; however this book
focuses on the characteristics that make the healing process unique to bereaved men, and serves as a repair manual to make
healing more complete and ultimately effective. Men strive to keep grief to themselves, maintain
emotional control, and refrain from asking for help. The Widower’s Toolbox allows bereaved
men to continue to fulfill the image society has of them as strong problem solvers that can fix anything including their grief
– because it is written specifically for them in a format of a take action approach, with the security of a repair reference
at their side.
Toolbox shares the direct experiences of the author who lost
his wife and mother of his two sons, to illustrate life is worth living after loss. Each chapter targets
specific concerns where bereaved men struggle to reassemble their fractured lives. The reader is reassured
through added dialog from eight other widowers that the reader’s feelings are shared by others and that grief is survivable.
For the reader who wants the details, each chapter also explains the academic viewpoint why they may be experiencing
certain feelings by explanation of a clinical psychotherapist. Ultimately, this book
channels the reader’s grief into healing tasks based upon the reflection of their past relationship and how it can propel
them to a brighter future.